I get quite a few messages from those who’ve learned that they are the emotionally abusive person in the relationship.
Fortunately, the only time I get messages from people like this is when they want to know how they can change. I never get a message from those telling me they know they are abusive and don’t care.
If you consider yourself an emotionally abusive person or have been told you are doing emotionally abusive behavior, first of all, give yourself some credit for even looking for a healing path to stop the behavior. After all, you are here reading this which means you are considering you may have some unhealthy behavior patterns going on inside you.
I learned about my own abusive behavior very late in life and lost every relationship because of it. After my marriage ended, I knew something had to change or I would never be happy, whether I was in a relationship or not.
My healing journey was difficult but I did it and so can you. Emotionally abusive behavior comes from not knowing there are other ways to get your needs met. When you feel the need to control or manipulate, it’s likely because you haven’t learned healthy ways to express yourself or tell people what you want.
Hurtful behavior can often stem from poor coping mechanisms. Learning better coping mechanisms is one of the components of healing.
For me, I always thought it would be easier to guilt those I love into giving me what I wanted instead of allowing them to be who they are. Once I learned how to heal from that behavior, everyone’s lives got easier. I no longer carried the burden of needing to control others, and they felt the freedom of being allowed to be themselves.
If you have come to the realization that you are doing emotionally abusive behavior and would like to change, join the Healed Being Program, a transformational healing program for the emotionally abusive person who wants to change. When you sign up, you’ll receive tools to help you start making changes right away.
The full program comes with a private, anonymous discussion forum and answers to questions I receive from you and others like yourself.
If you’re not really sure if you are emotionally abusive, I created this episode to help you figure it out. If after listening to the episode you think you may be doing emotionally abusive behavior and would like to stop doing that behavior, join the program by clicking the button below. The first four lessons are free with no obligation.
When you heal from being emotionally abusive, a lot changes in your life. You feel lighter and freer to be yourself. You are no longer constantly worried about what other people are doing. And you aren’t driving yourself crazy wondering why people won’t live up to your standards.
Emotional abuse ruins relationships and can leave emotional wounds for years. If you are emotionally abusive toward the closest people in your life and if you want to be happier and free of the pressure of wanting or needing to control those you love, make the change.
You can do this. It’s a difficult journey, but it’s worth every step.